This post isn't to inform anyone that we are still TTC, nor that we are pregnant, it's mainly just for me to get my feelings out, and I guess let everyone in.
Statistics show that if you are under 25 you have a 1 in 4 chance of becoming pregnant, meaning that it should take 4-5 months to conceive. I was on cycle 6 and still NOTHING. I am healthy, young, and appear to have no major problems to prevent me from getting pregnant, so why had I not yet conceived? Looking back on my charts I BD around my O date making my chances HIGH for becoming pregnant, yet nothing was happening! DH & I talked one night (after many days of depression) and he suggested I go see my doctor. The next day I scheduled an appt with a new OB.
REWIND: After DS was born I had the mirena put in. The 1st year I had no problems with it (except I lost a lot of weight and could never gain weight using it) the second year I had lots of problems with cysts on my ovaries. After having enough with the painful cysts I decided to have my IUD removed (plus I wanted to start TTC). My uterus was tilted so my doctor couldn't remove the IUD, I had to go in for "surgery" (put to sleep so they could remove it without hurting me) and get it removed. After having it removed I let my body go back to normal. We decided we were gonna start TTC so I made an appointment with my doctor to make sure I was in top shape and ready. My doctor refused to refer me to an OBGYN, pretty much said there was no such thing as a "pre-conception appointment". After she refused I called the appointment desk to get an appointment with a new doctors, in hopes THAT doctor would refer me. Long story short- I ended up NEVER getting a referral to an OBGYN and had to settle for an appointment with a NP. At the appointment the NP was confused why I was even there. I told her why I was there, and she said there is nothing they can do until we've tried for over a year. She never ran any tests, never asked any questions about mine or my DH's history, didn't ask me anything! Her only advice was to have sex every other day from CD10 to CD20 (didn't even ask how long my cycles are) and come back when I was pregnant, or unsuccessful for 13 months. By this time I was so irritated with that doctors office that I just gave up with the whole pre-conception appointment.
FAST FORWARD: 6 months later I'm still not pregnant and wondering what the heck is wrong with me! I called my new doctor in hopes I could get a "pre-conception" appt I had previously wanted. Luckily my new doctors office scheduled one for me. I went in last Friday and met with my new OBGYN. First of all, he's amazing! He took his time, never rushed me, listened to my concerns, and explained everything in detail. He was fantastic! Second of all, unlike the previous NP, he actually wants to run tests. He ordered 7 lab tests to check everything from my progesterone to my prolactin. He also put DH & I on a "schedule" as to when we can BD and when we can't. He is giving us 3 months to successfully conceive before he is going to perform a Hysterosalpingogram (HSG) which checks to see if my fallopian tube is blocked. Because of a past medical problem the chance of having a blocked fallopian tube is high. The Dr. also wants to check DH's sperm count. I am so happy my new OB is taking this serious and is willing to run tests for us. He was surprised it is taking so long for us to conceive!
Even though my doctor is being proactive about helping us conceive, we are still some what on a break. The last few weeks have been such a weight off my shoulders. I was so wrapped up in conceiving that my emotions were wrapped up in it all also. I feel like I lost myself in it all. I am happy now that I am not stressing over it. I am still temping, partially for TTC, and the other part to get more in touch with my body and it's cycles. BDing is no longer all about trying to catch the egg, but rather because we want to get it on ;-) DH & I both decided to NTNP (not try not prevent) for awhile. In a few months we may start actively trying again.. guess we'll just have to see when that time comes. As for now, it's nice just focusing on my DS and watching him grow up and learn new things!
Another topic I want to address is my emotions towards other people. I feel horrible for feeling the way I did when I got the news from SO MANY people all around the same time about their pregnancies and deliveries!! I am happy for each and every one of them! Some people this is their first.. and I remember being in that boat and feeling so many emotions when I found out I was pregnant to when I delivered my DS. I'm also happy for those friends that are due with their 2nd or 3rd.. it must be so exciting to have a sibling on the way! I look forward to the day my DS is a big brother!!
